The results of our survey: What do people with dissabilities think about devotees?

First of all, I want to thank all the people who took the time to answer the questions. With out you, this survey would not have been possible.
Thank you, Angelique
Our questions were:
When have you found out there is something like devotees? How?
In your opinion, why do people become attracted to disabled ones?
Do you see the devoteephenomena alltogether as positive or negative? For which reasons?
Have you had contact to devotees? By mail, phone, in real life? Tell us about it!
Question 1: When have you found out there is something like devotees(=people, who find disabilities attractive)? How?

man, 34, disabled: I've always known there was a subculture of men attracted to disabled women (especially amputees), but just recently realized there were women devotees to men as well. Surfing around the net is the only place I've seen anything on women devotees.

man, 20, disabled: through the internet about 3-5 years ago.

woman, 29, disabled: On the net

woman, 45, devotee: On the Internet, by complete chance

man, 52, disabled: In the 1970's. By having a devotee approach me and discuss the whole senario.

man, diasabled: about 6 months ago. joined a few on-line clubs/communities for the disabled and read about the admirers/devotees in the posts there. i then have conducted my own web search for any sites/links.

man, 29, diasabled: In the first six months following my injury. It was being discussed in chat room I was in.

man, 39, disabled: In the first six months following my injury. It was being discussed in chat room I was in.

man, 45, disabled: On the net

man, 37, disabled: I found out about the amputee devotee just a few days ago while surfing the web to pass time after I had surgery. While I was stunned that this type of interest was possible, I was also intrigued by the hope that it gave me. You see, my surgery was a double amputation (dak). The amputation saved my life.

question 2:In your opinion, why do people become attracted to disabled ones?

man, 34, disabled: Good question with many deep psychological variables. Often, it seems to come from a need to "nurse" or take care of someone, and our culture teaches us someone with a disability usually needs attending to. For others, it may come from an early positive association with a disabled person. For others it may be a control factor - someone with a mobility limitation may be perceived as easier to physically control than someone without.

man, 20, disabled: I honestly don't know and I am not complaining.

woman, 29, disabled: It is a sexual thing in the main. Just like some guys are attracted to legs and boobs etc.

woma, 45, devotee: We were born that way. I have been attracted to paralyzed people since as long as I can remember.

man, 52, disabledI guess for the same reasons as some are attrached to blondes or redheads, gay or lesbian, tallor short. I think it is a deep internal feeling that drives a person to exhibit the feeelings.

man, disabled: i haven't an idea. i would like to hope that it isn't due to a need of a devotee to feel superior or dominating. i'm uncertain if it's possible to group all devotees' reasons together. some might have more sinister reasons than others.

man, 29, disabled: I have no idea.

man, 39, disabled: Entrigue, experimentation, preference, proof of increased compassion, love and unseklfishness

man, 45, disabled: guess it makes them feel stronger

man, 37, disabled: I think you are born with the attraction.

Question 3: Do you see the devoteephenomena alltogether as positive or negative? For which reasons?
The answers to this question were remarkable: almost all men found it positive, unfortunately, only one woman with a dissability anwered the questions, so this is not representative. She made very sad experiance

woman, 29, disabled: Negative innocent people could get hurt. I e-mailed with a guy for 6 months till I realised he was only interested in me because of my SCI not in me as a person.

man,34, disabled: Probably both. Positive in the sense its refreshing to find someone who finds an attraction in what others are turned off by. A blond haired blue eyed woman doesn't necessarily consider men attracted to blue eyed blonds devotees, nor does a larger woman who dates men attracted to "BBW's". But, it can be negative to feel someone is with you for a reason other than your deeper self. Much like the scenario of the rich executive with the trophy wife, you have to wonder how deep a relationship is it?

man, 20; disabled: positive so long as they don't engage in harassment or illegal behaviour. But I think that is primarily a concern for male devotees, not female ones.

woman, 45, devotee: Do you think being right handed or left handed is something positive or negative ? Neither. It's just something. For me it's rather positive because devoteism is a hobby not an obsession.

man, 52, disabled: Both. Positive.....having someone want to be with you inspite of your disability or because of it doesn't really matter to me. the end result should be the same. However it is nice to think that someone likes/loves you inspite of the lack of limbs. Negative....there are a few airheads out there, as witnessed by some of the people on the Egoups and how they present themselves.

man, disabled: positive. as far as i'm concerned if a woman finds my disability - something which has made me very insecure about my body and overall attractiveness - a turn on, it's a win-win situation. i would also like to hope however, that the disability is only a starting point in any further development of a relationship and the real feelings would be dependent on myself as a person of a particular character/personality. otherwise, any other disabled person could spark that abled partner's "lust" at any time making the relationship an untrustworthy one and quite worthless.

man, 29, disabled: Speaking for me personally, I don't see anything negative about it. I have heard of bad situations before, but I think that is true of anything. If a woman is atracted to me for the same reasons that most people shy away from me for than I would say it is positive. Of course I have not met any devotee women so I am speeking without the benifet of experiance.

man, 39, disabled: Positive. People are more knowledgeable about people with disabilities. With increased knowledge comes decreased fear and increased understand. This leads to all sorts of relationship possibilities.

man, 45, disabled: Positive Makes disabled life somewhat better

man, 37, disabled: Positive, as long as the privacy and emotions of each person are respected.

Question 4:Have you had contact to devotees? By mail, phone, in real life? Tell us about it!

man, 34, disabled: I've been with several women whom I felt were ultimately just "giving me a try". Recently a woman came right out and told me she was the adventurous sort and thought it'd be fun because I was different. In those instances, it probably helps that I'm pretty decent looking and have a forward personality. An ex-girlfriend's father was an amp from a car wreck, which I'm sure helped break the ice on the disability subject, although it wasn't what attracted her to me or held us together. And, to my amusement, last summer while I was swimming, a couple into bondage thought my braces would make neat fetish gear!

man, 20, disabled: Only by email. It was wonderful but the main problem is there are very very few female devotees. Just look at this list. Hardly anybody ever posts.

man, 52, disabled: A few times. Some experiences were positive ....some negative.

man, disabled: just a couple of e-mails from 2 woman devotees who saw my picture. however, they live too far from me for any type of a relationship possible.

man, 29, disabled: Nothing more than a few e-mails.

man, 39, disabled: Real life. Married to devotee for eleven years. Current girlfriend is devotee (two years).

man, 45, disabled: Yes, once in bed, several times in e-mail

man, 37, disabled: Just today I got my first return email. This group will definately aid in my recovery.